The Ray Allen Show

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The front running Lakers are wrapped in their insulated cocoon.  Their adoring fandom with botox and collagen faces frozen with vacuous smiles, loving their beat down of the Celtics in game 1.  The panting lapdogs in the media led by Plaschke and Simers prematurely pronouncing the Celtics eulogy, giddily glomming onto the purple and gold bandwagon.

Reports of the Celtics demise is greatly exaggerated.  These are not your Orlando Magic who laid down at your feet last year.  The Celtics were admittedly putrid in game 1, but one game does not a series make.

Bynum disagrees with a call and does jumping jacks of disgust in the face of the ref…  If Perkins did that he would be suspended for the rest of the series.

Ray Allen is silky smooth on a transcendental level.  Shaking defenders with pinball sprints and cuts, catching and shooting with a sniper’s cold efficiency.  He had 22 points halfway through the second quarter. He finished the half with a record tying 7 three pointers.

The referees continue to inject themselves into the the game like they are Joe West.  KG with 3 early fouls, and Kobe picks up his third on a questionable offensive foul late in the second quarter.  Game one was a whistle fest from the beginning, starting with the brutal cop out matching technical’s when Artest body slammed Pierce’s face into the floor.  Matching tech?  Game 2 has not been much better.

The Celtics show they can’t stand prosperity.  After carefully constructing a double digit lead on Ray Rays back, they threw the ball to Kobe for a dagger three that you knew he was going to make- whittling the C’s lead to a tenuous 6 at the half.

Perkins has hands like feet.  Every time he touches the ball it is a turnover waiting to happen.  It is mystifying why they ever try to establish him in the post.

2nd half starts ominously as Lakers take the lead aided by another brutal call on a great block by Pierce.  The glitterati are goaded by the jumbotron to notice and applaud like they are a game show audience.

Celtics foul plagued front court has been nothing short of awful.  Kobe has been called for two fouls that I am grateful for as a Celtics fan.  Big Baby rejects Bynum cleanly and is -surprise- called for a foul.  What the fuck is going on?

Inglewood native Pierce makes his 1st field goal midway through the third quarter. I bet Atlas (Ray Allen) thinks it would be nice if he joined the party, ’cause this team is getting heavy.

Kobe picks up his 5th early in the fourth quarter and he stays in the game, which shows who is actually coaching the team.  Ray has cooled and the Celts are getting by on the energy of Big Baby and little big man Nate Robinson.

Garnett is making Gasol a prophet.  Missing shots he normally makes in his sleep and fumbling rebounds like he has arthritis, his game is timid and passive.  Davis is at least 6 inches shorter at the same position, and I want him in there instead.

The 6′ 1″ guy (Rondo) literally plays more above the rim than the 7′ Perkins.  I hate to pile on but effort is far more desirable than size for me,

Down the stretch the Celtics prevail with their trademark defense and an effort far greater than game one. Kobe totally fouls in the circle and they don’t have the balls to call the DQ.  Phil Jackson strains his labia trying to impose his Yoda will onto the refs, and justice exhales a sigh of relief.  Creaky gang green prevailing against the evil death star- the rag tag left for dead former champs proudly pick themselves off the cold slab of the coroners table and announce their presence with authority.

How you like me now Simers you fuck?  Wings@RollinSD.com

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