The Man Rules

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This has been out for a while and we posted it a few months back.  I overheard a conversation at lunch today and one of the guys was such a pussy.  He kept telling his friend, No I can’t, it would not be cool with Cindy.  Cindy would not let me do that.  Cindy if you are reading this, lighten up girl.  You have your man whipped real well, but let him live a little bit.  If you keep it up you are going to run him off.  Do you have any that need to be added?   One that comes to mind after lunch would be to stay away from chicks named Cindy. TMTMTL@RollinSD.com

The Man Rules we always hear “the rules” from the female side. Now here are the rules from the male side. These are our rules!  Please note… these 20 are all numbered “1 “ ON PURPOSE!

1.Men are NOT mind readers.

1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You’re a big girl. If it’s up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don’t hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

1. Sunday sports – It’s like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.

1. Crying is blackmail.

1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one:  Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it!

1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That’s just what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.  In fact, all comments become Null and void after 7 Days.

1. If you think you’re fat, you probably are. Don’t ask us.

1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one

1. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done- not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

1. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials.

1.. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.

1.. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. Peach for example, is a fruit, not a color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.

1. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say “nothing,” We will act like nothing’s wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.

1. If you ask a question you don’t want an answer to, expect an answer you don’t want to hear.

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine, really!

1. Don’t ask us what we’re thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as FOOTBALL or how hot the blonde in the grocery store looked.

1. You have enough clothes.

1. You have too many shoes.

1. I am in shape.  Round IS a shape!

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