Advice Column

RSA-Staring At Breasts Increases Heart Health

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I have seen the emails for years now and didn’t know if it was true or not. Leave it to a Boston station to report on this.  I have always thought that at 44 yrs old I am pretty healthy. I drink more than most and eat like shit but still feel like I am in better shape than most. I went out for a late lunch today and ended up at the Silver Fox from 3 to 7  and came home feeling no pain..  Had some dinner and am still on the computer. I will be up at 5 am tomorrow to work out and is that why I am in good shape?   I don’t think so. I stare a womens chest all the time. I can’t help it. I really need to wear sunglasses all the time so I can just stare at her tits non stop. I need to show my wife this video so when I walk by her showering she won’t cover up her perfect tits on me. Guys please show you girls this video and have them walk around the house all day topless. If my wife showed me a video that said watching your man mow the lawn naked would make you healthier you bet I would be out there 4 days a week cutting the grass and charging the neighbors $10 each to pull up their beach chairs and watch.  My kids would be selling ice tea at $2 a cup and we would be the hit of Scripps Ranch.  As you can see in the video it doesn’t matter what the breast looks like. They can be mosquito bites or big ass slinkies hanging down past her belly button.  A tit is a tit and staring at them will make you healthier.  So if you are at the grocery store, you kids game,  a school board meeting or at church feel free to stare.   You now are only doing it because it will help our hearts health.  Now the real question I have is will my insurance cover some of my cover charge at Pacers or Cheetah’s?  I think attending twice a week should be part of my routine for staying healthy.  TMTMTL@RollinSD.com

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John is a badass motha fucka

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